Don’t our moms say the darnest things? It’s hard keeping up with new technology, slang and lifestyles but luckily they have us around to correct them and document everything they say or do.
We polled our Faze readers and compiled a list of hilarious things that mothers everywhere have said.
1. My mom once wrote “LOL” on her friend’s Facebook post about someone passing away in death because she thought it meant “Lots Of Love.”
2. We were at Second Cup and my mom ordered a medium double-double coffee and then was offended when the barista told her she had to put her own milk and sugar in her coffee. “I have to pay more for this coffee and put my own milk and sugar in it?! I definitely will not be having a second cup here.”
3. My mom thought that GTL was a new car instead of gym, tan, and laundry.
4. For the longest time my mom thought that Siri was an actual person. “Why don’t you call your friend Siri and ask for directions? She seems to know everything.”
5. I accidentally texted my mom “WTF” and told her that it meant “well that’s fantastic” and now she uses that phrase all the time when we’re texting.
6. One time I asked my mom to take a picture of me and she held up my phone, put the camera lens up to her eye and thought it was a camera viewfinder.
7. My mom and I just came back from the Jays game and we know nothing about baseball so when we were there she turns to me and says, “Just cheer when everyone is cheering.” So every time the people around us cheered, two seconds later my mom would end up being the loudest and the most clueless person there.
8. My mom once called an SD card a STD card.
9. In Taylor Swift’s Style, my mom thought that instead of “red lip classic” she was saying “Brad Pitt classic.” She was really confused as to why Taylor was comparing herself to Brad Pitt!
10. Whenever I show my mom a picture on Instagram she always tries to make the picture bigger, it never fails! And when it doesn’t work she tells me that my phone is broken.
11. My mom thought I told her I was at a “Rape Café” instead of the “Crepe Café.”
12. The first time my mom heard Gangnam Style she thought the lyrics were “Oprah got no style.”
13. Whenever we tell our mom that we’re hungry she always responds “I don’t carry the fridge and oven with me.” Yes, we know that but we were kind of hoping you’d make something for us!
14. My mom once told off a Starbucks employee because she tried to correct her as she ordered a “small” coffee.
Barista: So you want a tall black coffee ma’m?
Mom: What the heck is a tall coffee? I want a regular coffee.
Barista: In Startbucks the size is called “tall”.
Mom: So the smallest sized cup you have is called a “tall?” I don’t think that makes sense to anyone dear. You should stop saying that out loud because it doesn’t make you sound very smart. You can let you manager know that I told you that.
14. My dad bought my mom a Kobo reader for her birthday. She asked him if she could put games on it and when he said no she told him to return it for a piece of technology she could actually use.
15. My mom thinks that WTF means Wednesday, Thursday or Friday. “Are you coming home this week? WTF?”
16. My mom pronounces “Winners” as “Wieners” because she’s from the Philippines. “I went to ‘Wieners’ today and bought you and your brother a few things. I love ‘Wieners’ because everything is designer but cheaper. Why would I shop anywhere else?”
17. I told my mom that I was thinking about getting a bob cut so she told me that she’ll shave it off for me to save me money (my uncle’s name is Bob and he’s bald).
18. I’m 24 years old now and my mom still tells me that if I eat too much cookies I’m going to turn into the Cookie Monster from Sesame Street.
19. My mom thought I called her something while we were texting.
Me: Mom you’re being biased.
Mom: No I’m not! I’m your mother and I’m female.
Me: I don’t think being biased has anything to do with being female.
Mom: Oh, I thought you were calling me bi?
Me. Biased = unfairly prejudging. Bi = bisexual.
20. My mom thinks the poop emoji is a chocolate kiss with eyes!