Movies & TV

Shameless Lies Spring Break Movies Tell You

Let’s face it, the majority of the spring break movies that Hollywood has produced just feed viewers with false depictions of what a “fun” spring break should look like. Here’s our advice to you—DON’T BELIEVE A THING!

Here’s a list of the craziest lies spring break movies tell you.

Spring Breakers (2012)

Lie: It’s a logical idea to rob a restaurant in order to afford your spring break vacation, then hookup with a pimp named Alien and kill a bunch of people while wearing bikinis all day.

First of all, wearing a wet bikini all day is not as comfortable as it seems and can actually result in a yeast infection, secondly, YOU CAN GO TO JAIL, and jail is definitely not a fun place, especially considering that you’d be tainted with a criminal record!


Piranha 3D (2010)

Lie: Prehistoric, crazy, man-eating fish will emerge from the bottom of a lake and kill basically everyone that steps foot in the water, and officials won’t close down the lake for the sake of everyone’s safety in order to continue producing revenue.

So I’m sure everyone can notice the over-exaggerated premise of this film. I’m sure there may be killer piranhas somewhere in the ocean, but I can almost guarantee there won’t be any in a highly populated tourist destination that caters to spring breakers. And even if there were some sort of dangerous animal out there in the lake, officials will prevent people from entering the water, and/ or close the lake for liability reasons and simply for the safety of others.


From Justin to Kelly (2003)

Lie: You will find “true love” during your week-long spring break.

Let’s be honest, true love can’t develop within a week. Getting into a serious relationship requires understanding the other person on a deeply personal level. Just because you danced with him/her a couple times and shared some drinks and laughs over the course of the short WEEK, doesn’t mean you are in “love”. There may be some feelings there, but it’s most likely to be a case of infatuation.


22 Jump Street (2014)

Lie: Drinking on the beach is legal and if you’re under age, you’re probably going to get away with it.

Practically every spring break movie shows a whole lot of alcohol consumption while on the beach. Guess what, beach drinking is illegal! And especially do not pull out a can of beer if you’re under age, even if everyone else is doing so! Cops are monitoring everywhere, especially due to the fact that thousands of teens have come together to party.


Mardi Gras: Spring Break (2011)

Lie: Breaking into a celebrity’s hotel room is a good idea.

By no means is breaking into a celebrity’s room a good idea. In fact, breaking in anywhere prohibited is not a good idea at all. I’m sure you can enjoy spring break without having to trespass. Plus breaking in somewhere takes a lot of unnecessary effort and risk. Just relax and enjoy your spring break.


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