Dating Someone Jewish As a Non-Jew

date jewish couple

Dating has been one of the most quintessential activities for adults all around the world. People are getting into this even as young as elementary school. Some don’t even know the meaning of the word yet they want to do it anyway. There is something about meeting someone new that can be a part of the new experience.  It can change your life forever, you may have some amazing memories along the way, or it would be too awful that you would want to forget about it. This doesn’t change the fact that people do enjoy doing it and there is nothing wrong with that.

With the world already taken over by the internet, it is quite interesting to see that most cultures are becoming known to each other. Globalization was only thought of as a term that can be used for businesses going international, but this can be related to dating as well. It is especially true in North America, where two of the biggest countries are considered as melting pots of different cultures. This is why it is important to know the other person’s way of life before even asking for some personal questions. Here are some dating tips that you should apply on your next date.

For example, many people are interested in dating a Jew. Some might not even be interested in the first. It just so happens that the person that they like is actually Jew. There are a lot of questions about this one since it is a question of faith rather than just culture. Both of these do interconnect most of the time, but there are also instances wherein the two cannot be separated at all. This leads to a confusion in dating community. Are you even allowed to date a Jew in the first place? As there are a lot of questions, this article is hoping to shed some light on the realities of dating someone Jewish.

Before all of this, take note that as with most religions which members all around the world, there are also branches of Judaism. This has been mostly because of the diaspora as all of them are trying to find the Promised Land. There are even calls to return home now like in this link: Each of them follow the main law, but have made alterations so that it would fit in to the place that they are and the time period. Some believe that the purest form of Judaism can now only be found in Israel. In this article, we shall be referring to the community as a whole to make it easier to understand.

The Clash between the Past and Present

jew scarf

It is to be noted that the Talmud only allows for both man and woman to be Jewish for them to date. Historically, it is punishable by death if you are going to date someone from another religion. That, or you will be stricken from your family history which was seen as worse since you will now be technically excommunicated and Yahweh will never recognize you. In other words, you will not be allowed to enter heaven. Most of them would actually go to Jewish dating sites to just meet another member of their religion. This is just for heterosexual partnerships as same-sex relationships is still taboo in almost all communities. That is another topic which can be quite extensive as well.

In the modern, more liberal society, it seems that there is a sort of change in the community when it comes to interfaith marriages. It is a common custom that if you were not a follower of Judaism, then it would be customary to convert before the marriage takes place. However, this is not the case anymore as there are rabbis who actually allow interfaith marriages to happen. They just advise their followers to treat the non-Jew as best they could so that he or she will convert in the end.

Judaism is also not a Christian religion, even though many people still view it as otherwise. Therefore, most of their beliefs can be traced back in the Old Testament. For the followers of Judaism, Jesus was not a divine being; therefore He is not to be considered as such. This is also why most the devout still follow most of the teachings that were passed down from Adam, Moses, Abraham and Jacob. If you want a more in-depth explanation, the Bible can hold some of the answers for you. Explore the Old Testament easier by going here.

Dating Someone Not In the Faith

jew in jerusalem

If you are dating a Jew and you are not a part of their faith, it is important to ask first whether it would be alright for them. Most of the younger members of the community seem to have a more relaxed stance on most things that are related to their religion. This is why interfaith dating is so common amongst adolescents and young adults. Depending on the person or family, this can change one marriage is already on the discussion. However, there is nothing wrong with dating someone from another religion.

However, it is still important to respect the other person’s beliefs. This can be applied for every single instance of meeting someone in your life. The Jews may have customs that are not familiar or even bizarre for you. It doesn’t hurt to ask but be respectful about it. There are also some sensitive topics that you cannot touch even with a 10 feet pole. You don’t want to an open conversation about the Holocaust while eating Matzo ball soup.  Here’s a great recipe though to impress your date:

Most of the ones who are serious about their faith may also be thinking about marriage and family while dating you. This is the end goal of dating for some of them, so it is important to be honest as much as possible. It is forbidden for their faith to do ginevaat da’at; that is deceiving another person with false intentions. You should reciprocate this by being honest with yourself as well.

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