Meditation has many benefits, like finding a sense of peace, calm, and wellbeing. But how many of us can actually make meditation a habit? Do some people have a natural Zen vibe or more self-discipline?
For years, I wished I could meditate several times a week on a regular basis, but I couldn’t sustain the practice. That changed last year when I asked myself, “What would happen if I regularly meditated every week for a year?” I was curious and thought it would be worthwhile to find out. I spent a year on this journey, and I knew the only way to get through my new meditation practice was to try things differently.
Adopting a meditation habit had some learning curves, and it was by no means perfect. For weeks, I missed meditation sessions throughout the year, but I refused to see this as failure. I considered it a learning curve—after all, some meditation seemed better than no meditation. It took some trial and error to incorporate habits that fit my lifestyle, but I ended up meditating four times a week.
The experiment brought bigger changes than I had anticipated. I became aware of my thoughts and behaviours, which led me to change my mentality, perspective, and then my lifestyle. Above all, I felt connected to my inner self, cultivated a sense of wellbeing, became more resilient to stress, and encountered some uncomfortable emotions that surprised me. Meditating for a year was a journey of healing, letting go, and finding self-love. I was surprised to learn that looking inward made me more open to socializing with others.
With life-changing experiences that extended beyond what I bargained for, I knew I would continue the practice of regular meditation. Here are 9 essential tips to make meditation a habit.
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1. Find your why
We don’t want to set expectations for ourselves during meditation because meditation is a practice of being rather than doing. But it does help to be mindful of why we want to meditate. Goal setting helps us focus and re-evaluate our methods especially if our methods aren’t working for us. Determining our goals helps us find strategies that steer us closer to our aims.
Your goals may also affect when you meditate. Do you want to meditate because you wish to sleep better, feel more relaxed, declutter the mind from the business of the day?
Morning meditations may be more beneficial if you wish to focus and start your day feeling energized, while evening meditations may be best to relax and sleep at night. You may have more than one goal which could very well give you many incentives to meditate.
2. Find a realistic time for your practice and tie it to another activity
Attempting to emulate the meditation dream, I thought it would be serene to meditate early mornings at 5 a.m. I soon realized that regularly waking up at 5 a.m. was not sustainable for me, so I tried waking up at 6 a.m. I eventually realized that sacrificing my sleep left me tired by the early afternoon and feeling fatigued was neither motivating nor productive. At times, meditation felt so good that I needed more time to sleep. (While people may feel tired after meditation, it is likely that they simply feel relaxed and realize that they needed more rest to begin with.) I knew that the only way to make the habit stick was to find something practical rather than aspirational. The key was also to meditate around the same time at each practice. But that wasn’t all.
James Clear, the author of Atomic Habits, suggests pairing the habit that you wanted to cultivate with an activity that you already do. I took his advice and paired meditation close to breakfast time, and I was able to start the workday feeling clear-headed. Once I changed the timing to fit my lifestyle, meditation seemed like something I would look forward to. This practice brought me a sense of wellbeing rather than a chore.
3. Create a space for meditation
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We have desks for working, and beds for sleeping, so it only made sense to have something for meditating. For me, the magic association was a yoga mat which meant that I could move it to a quiet room if needed. Although, most of the time, the yoga mat stayed in one spot. Also, picking a soothing colour, like blue, made this meditation space feel more like a sanctuary.
You want to feel comfortable during meditation and for some, including myself, sitting for 30 minutes is not appealing. Have a pillow to rest your head if you lie down, and switch positions, if needed. A comfortable position allowed me to stay awake and focused. During the warmer months, meditating at a park was a nice change and a wonderful way to experience nature.
4. Set a reward system
I like checkmarks, I think we all do. Every time I completed my meditation, I entered the session as an event on my google calendar, and yes, the event was colour-coded. It was easy to see how often I meditated, or if I had started to miss meditation sessions. There is something gratifying about having a visual cue to indicate that I reached my goal, kind of like the stickers we got in school when were little. Choose a reward system that motivates you.
5. Pick the right sound (guided meditation)
If sitting down quietly while nothing pops into your head seems overwhelming, I hear you. This is probably an unrealistic expectation to begin with. There are many available sources for guided meditation, including apps, meditation centres (that offer in-person and online sessions), podcasts, and YouTube videos. I used YouTube because it allowed me to choose a video and a theme that I gravitated towards, depending on what I was going through. For example, you can find meditation videos for forgiveness, calm, healing, and positivity. The variety of meditations was a perfect remedy for a feeling of being stuck, and it gave me the added benefit of never being bored. Sometimes, it was nice to listen to calming music without a guide. Play around with the tracks and mediums and see what works for you.
6. Start small
It takes time to build up the stamina to meditate, just as it takes time to build up stamina to exercise. Set a goal of 5 or 10 minutes and work up to what feels like a comfortable number for you. You can also start small by practising new techniques like breathing exercises, visualizations, or body scans (to become self- aware, you focus on one part of the body at a time to become self- aware). Gradually increasing the duration of meditation will leave room for exploration and growth.
7. Be accountable
Telling my close friends and family about my goal to pursue a weekly meditation practice turned out to be a great source of support. They were curious and engaged; they spoke about their own experiences and even suggested meditation centres. Talking to people also helped me be accountable. When friends and family asked how I was doing with my meditation journey, their interest was motivating and a nice reminder to get back to meditating if I had missed some sessions.
8. Log it
During meditation, you are bound to experience, observe, and gain awareness of your emotions, behaviours, and thoughts. You may have “aha moments”, or possibly become aware of uncomfortable emotions that usually don’t surface when you are busy doing other things. There is a difference between engaging in a thought and simply observing it. Journaling, or noting a few points allows you to reflect on the meditation. Reflecting on your experience lets you see patterns in thoughts or behaviour that you wish to change. Personally, I found this helpful especially when I heard my inner voice that reassured me that things would be all right during times of uncertainty. Writing down these affirmations stuck this message with me for the rest of the day and served as positive reinforcement to keep going.
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9. Try meditating with a group
I had some experience with meditation before I pursued my goal to set up a meditation practice. When I was unfamiliar with different types of meditation, I tried several meditation groups. Meditating with a group can help you quickly experience various kinds of meditation and acquire skills like breathing, visualizations, and body scans.
Group settings also provide you with an environment that gets you in the zone to meditate with less effort. Perhaps it is the low dim lights, the aromatic incense, soothing music, or the spacious rooms. A meditation centre makes it easier to relax. You also get a chance to share your experiences and connect with those around you.
Resources for your meditation practice
There are many types of meditations across the globe. Here are a few options to get started.
Jon Kabat-Zinn, founder of Mindfulness-Based Stress Reduction of (MBSR).
This resource is an excellent to learn techniques likes breathing, visualization and body scans. Kabat-Zinn draws from ancient Buddhist practices and his programs are used in medical centres and wellness centres.
Kundalini Yoga
Kundalini Yoga is an ancient yoga practice originating from India and is a popular form of meditation.
Good luck and have fun with your meditation practice. There is much to discover.
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